Hi again, Sparkles! It’s me, Kitty. Today I wanted to work on a series of posts for a DDLG 101! I see a lot of new people asking questions about jumping into the lifestyle, and I want to educate! Please know that anything in my DDLG 101 series, like anything else written here, is my own opinion and while many of us who make this type of content may agree on some things, it can be different for everyone!!!
Warning: This post is my own DDLG 101, and it is full of my opinions! I know that not everyone will agree with me, and that’s okay because every dynamic is different. However, let’s try to stay respectful of one another! If you comment please try to discuss, not attack! Also, please remember that I use Daddy Dom as just a term, but that this is for EVERY caregiver we have, Mommy and Daddies a like!
What is DDLG?
DDLG stands for Daddy Dom Little Girl. It can also be seen as Daddy Dom Little Boy, (DDLB), Mommy Dom Little Girl or Boy, (MDLG/LB).
This relationship is a power exchange relationship, and it is also part of the BDSM community whether or not the little and their caregiver are sexual together. Why is that you may ask? The basis of a DDLG relationship is between a Daddy/Mommy DOMINANT and it is a power exchange relationship. What that means is the little is giving up power to the Daddy/Mommy/Caregiving figure. They are given rules and tasks, in exchange for reprimands and rewards. The two parties (or more if you have that dynamic) agree on give and take and the power exchange between parties exists. Many dynamics have rules and chore lists to make sure they get things done, guidelines for their days such as what to wear, how to behave, etc. and in exchange, are given rewards like treats, toys, praise, etc.
By having a power exchange relationship, in my opinion, you are involved in kink. You are giving someone the ability to have a form of control over you and your life, and you are submitting to that control. Again, this doesn’t mean it has to be a sexual lifestyle for you, but it is a kink lifestyle. At least, in my opinion.
How are Daddy Doms different from other types of Doms?
For me, this is both simple and complicated to answer. Just like every submissive doesn’t fit one type of role (sub, brat, pet, etc) I don’t believe that every Dom first one type of role either (Daddy, Dom, Master, etc.). However, the generic idea behind what a Daddy Dom is is that the dominant figure is more nurturing and gentle. They’re often seen as a “soft dom” as they do not tend to dole out the harsher styled punishments that a Master might. They like all Dominants, see their submissive as equal but they tend to put the Little on a type of pedestal with treatment.
Honestly, I really don’t like writing out what the “difference” is because when you look up this question of what a Daddy Dom is, a lot of the things they are seen as, align with other types of Doms! A Master protects, teaches and guides his submissive, and for some dynamics that may include the daily life, not just the submissive/sexual life. And I guess that this is where the majority (at least from what I have seen) draw a line between Daddies and other Doms.
Daddy Doms, in the have a more guiding hand in the daily life of their little, where they nurture, guide, teach and protect much in the way of a partner/boyfriend who is soft and gentle.
While a Daddy Dom is seen as ‘soft’, Masters and Owners are seen as harsh. With guidelines and punishments that are strict and could potentially really push boundaries. What I think it comes down to really, is the type of submissive the dominant has and that is a little. I think that having a little is what defines a Daddy Dom!
Well, then what is a Little?
Just like there are many different types of Daddies out there, there are many types of littles! A little or a baby girl/boy is a submissive person who has a huge childlike side that breaks out like rays of sunlight, into the world! We’re adults (aged over 18 years old) who just…want to be a kid forever! We come in many shapes, sizes, colors, and flavors! Littles tend to be more sensitive, and need a softer hand than a submissive who craves the more….harsher treatment of a Master or Owner. With softer cravings comes the clinginess, whining and sometimes downright tantrums of a paradise called: Little Space.
A big thing about being a little is that many regress down to a childlike age. When I say regress? I mean it. Our minds change and morph into this technicolor paradise filled with glitter, sparkles, and our love for our Daddies! Some littles regress so far that they join into the ABDL (adult baby diaper lover) lifestyle, and may wear/use diapers and actual bottles. They can become non-verbal as well. If you’re not a little who enjoys the ABDL lifestyle, or even parts of it, there are a few brackets of little “ages” that one can fit into! Childspace, Middlespace, Teenspace. All of these are Little spaces and have their own parameters I guess you could say.
Obviously, Child space is the smallest of the Littles (other than babies)! A lot of these littles use sippies, paci’s, sensory toys and other childlike items. This may be where they start to play with Barbies and other toys – just like a regular kid! I personally would put the age range from like… potty training age so around 3, to 7.
Middle Space is where you’re still a little childlike, but nearing that teenage phase of slight rebellion and attitude. I would put it from 7-12. You’re not afraid to be a little kiddy, but sometimes you wanna be a little more “grown-up” if that makes sense? I like to think of middle space as back in 7th grade, circa like…. 2004. Hahaha!
Teen Space is exactly what it sounds like. Rebellion, bratty teens romping around in Daddy’s house! Wanting to stay up late, and go out, and eat all the candy they can, they crave being babies and pampered with that bright light of freedom just at the end of the tunnel. I put this age from 13-17.
Now. I don’t think I know a single little who just fits into one little bracket. Seriously, as I said before there are so many things a little can be and you can be a range of ages. Like me, personally? I would say I roll around between childlike and teen space like a pinball. I’m extra bratty and defiant, while also super shy and quiet and just a little baby! (When I say I’m a little baby, I do not partake in ABDL, I just like being called a little baby!) And no matter what brackets you may pull from, you’re just as little as the rest of us!
Are there special items associated with DDLG?
There are so many items associated with Little Space and DDLG, but don’t get me wrong. Just because you don’t use any of these items, doesn’t mean you’re any less of a little. Some of these items include:
- Adult sized pacifiers (do not use infant/child sized pacifiers they are bad for your teeth)
- Sippy cups
- Sensory toys such as blocks that crinkles and crunch etc.
- Adult sized cribs
- Adult sized onesies
- Stuffed animals (stuffies!!!)
Many of these items can be purchased on Amazon, and my favorite place to shop for little items is Instagram! I know what you’re thinking, Instagram?! YES. Instagram has such a HUGE following of DDLG shops it’s amazing. In fact, it’s so amazing that I’ve begun compiling a list of shops for the blog!
As another reminder, and I’m sure you’re super tired of hearing this, these items do not define a little. Some littles don’t like paci’s and sippies. They just prefer larger cups with adorable patterns on them. Sometimes, it’s just as simple as a workout water bottle. There are so many different ideas out there of what items are for little space, and each one is unique and personal!
I hope that this part one of DDLG 101 could help you understand the two different roles! It’s something I’ve been working hard on, and I am really excited to bring this content to you guys and try to educate as much as possible! Please keep an eye out for part 2, of DDLG 101!!!
Thanks for reading my blog post, In My Little Space DDLG 101 – Part 1!!! It is incredible to bring this to you guys and start working on my very own guide! I promise to write up my own DDLG life sometime soon! Pinkie Promise!
I really appreciate the time you took to read this and would love for you to follow me on social media to keep up to date!